Showing posts from January, 2018

“Success” and Stomach Amputation

A popular online publication recently published a piece that purported to talk about the pros and cons of stomach amputation and stomach binding (also known as “bariatric” or “weight loss” surgery.)There’s no way I’m giving it traffic, so there won’t be a link. And while people are allowed to do whatever they want with their bodies, including amputate or bind their stomachs (though that doesn’t mean it’s appropriate to discuss in every space,) it’s important that we talk about the realities of these surgeries. The story mentioned a failure rate of 1 in 10, which seems low based on the research, but perhaps that’s explained at least a little bit by what people consider a “success.”One woman who says she’s “very happy” and has “no regrets” has had three of these surgeries. A lap band that had to be removed when “For five days, I wasn’t able to keep food down. At the hospital, I found out the lower portion of my stomach protruded through the band to the top, so I was basically choking on…

Buy My Fatshions!

I’ve just listed some treasured fatshions for sale on eBay!
These items are new with tags, ModCloth and Eshakti
Just trying to get some grocery money.
Check out my items here:
(Please forgive the username, I’ve had it since the 90’s, it’s the title of a fave punk song.)Feel free to ask me questions here. The gown I have listed I have two of, identical.Rad Fatty Love to ALL,<3
SP.S. Check out and use the hashtag: #FatAndFree on Insta & FB!
And my hashtag #DateMyDamnSelf on Instagram if you feel so inclinedDonate to this blog here: blog’s Facebook page for things I share that aren’t on this blog (and updated daily): Or get the same “shared” content on Twitter: @NotBlueAtAll

I also have an Instagram I’ve finally started to actually use: as always, please feel free to drop me a line in comments here or write me an email, I love hearing from readers. (Tell me your troubles, I don’t judge.): notblu…

Distraction in Action

The last few weeks I have been busy as a bee interviewing for all the jobs! I have also been spending a lot of time in my head, for better or worse. Mostly just processing things and supporting friends and doing my best to be better support to myself. I am in a good place, mentally and emotionally, even physically I feel pretty great lately. I have also gone on a few dates, even got stood up once. While I’m perfectly good with being single, and have immediate hopes or plans for changing that, it’s been a nice distraction from the day to day.Because I don’t have a daily routine as a job would require, I haven’t been wearing makeup except for interviews and dates. I enjoy the process of putting on makeup. I like the time and attention of just focusing on one thing, and the end result is FABULOUS! I also enjoy the process of getting to know folks through dating apps. I know it’s not for everyone, but I find people interesting, for the most part.I’m just me, interview or date or not. I do…

On joining #FatStudyGroup

Breastfeeding Reduces Long-Term Risk for Diabetes

Here is yet another study showing that breastfeeding long-term decreases the risk for developing diabetes.

In this latest study, breastfeeding for a total of 12 months or more cut the risk for diabetes by about HALF.

That's a pretty significant decrease. It's not an absolute guarantee against diabetes, of course, but there is excellent evidence that breastfeeding strongly reduces the risk for diabetes or delays its presentation. This has obvious benefits for heart health.

This latest study just adds to the accumulating evidence of the importance of breastfeeding for a woman's long-term health. Pregnancy alters the metabolism significantly, increasing insulin resistance and blood sugar in order to divert more energy to the developing baby. This is good in the short term, but bad for the mother long term.

Biologically speaking, lactation was meant to "re-set" the mother's metabolism back to normal after pregnancy. When this doesn't happen, the mother's meta…


I can’t say it any better than Caitlin Stout does.If I’m being honest, I have been struggling quite a bit lately. This past year has been marked by a depression diagnosis, lots of sleepless nights, a new patch of gray hair, and a noticeable dip in my academic performance. I am weary, in the most profound sense of the word. And I am so scared to admit that, because I know that people like my professor will hear it and say to themselves, “Well, that’s just what happens when you give in to sin.”I think he might be right.I think maybe depression is what happens when you are constantly told that you are inherently broken. Maybe anxiety is a natural response to multiple anti-gay harassment incidents. Maybe stress takes its toll when the responsibility of speaking on behalf of an entire community is placed on your shoulders. Maybe joy feels elusive when you spend your evenings comforting friends who have been rejected by their families. Maybe it’s difficult to concentrate on homework when yo…

Last post...for now

I am a Psychotherapist and Cultural Worker. I am Fat.

I started this blog in 2008, around the time that I started working on a PhD. I wanted a place where I could work out ideas and talk things through in a community setting. I knew that I couldn't rely on academia to provide me with that space. As an activist I was more interested in what was happening at grassroots level than what was fashionable in the ivory tower.

I am writing this in 2018, nearly ten years later, as I make preparations to take an indefinite pause. I am stopping because I need more breathing space in my life and, over the last six months, I've noticed I have less energy for blogging. Other people can take up the work if they wish, and can do it better than me. Like many people ten years ago, I was naïve about blogging on a corporate platform, and my feelings about internet surveillance, trolling and the institutional and professionalised appropriation of marginal voices online have since sharpened. I no long…

Your Justification For Fat Shaming donald Is Bullshit – Here’s Why

After donald’s recent physical and his physician’s questionable press conference, the internet exploded with all manner of fat shaming of donald, followed by people being called out for, and subsequently attempting to justify, their fat shaming. Y’all, I have seen some nonsense today.Sadder still, a lot of it came from people who normally get it when it comes to fat activism.  If you’re wondering what constitutes a bullshit justification of fat shaming donald, I’m here to help:It’s not fat shaming because he is a horror of a human being!It’s totally fat shaming, even when you fat shame a horrible human being. If you argue that it’s ok to fat shame someone you don’t like, your fat friends and loved ones (and everyone who interacts with you, including co-workers) know what you really think of us – and what you’ll start saying about us if you don’t like what we do.If you are saying something about donald that you wouldn’t want said about you, or about a fat loved one, you are fucking up.…

Rest in Power, Blunderwoman

Bella Emberg's death last week gave me pause to think about Blunderwoman, one of the few fat characters I encountered on TV when I was growing up in the UK in the 1980s.

Blunderwoman was the sidekick to Russ Abbott's Cooperman. Abbott, terminally unfunny and over-exposed, created an absurd superhero based on actual comic genius Tommy Cooper. Abbott wrote Blunderwoman for Emberg and she upstaged him every time. One of the most important laws of the universe is that an older fat woman in a sequinned superhero outfit will always outshine anything within a significant radius. The comedy was crude and crass, he gave her an insulting character and she made it her own through sheer force of performance talent and charisma.

Blunderwoman is ridiculous, stupid, clumsy and can't do anything right. As a young fat woman I cringed my way through it, dreading the inevitable playground names that followed each broadcast. Back then, Blunderwoman was my nemesis. I wanted to be treated as full…

Social Cleansing and the End of the Obesity Epidemic

I had the pleasure of spending a bit of time with Cat Pausé recently whilst she was in London. She is one of the few fat activists currently engaged with building global networks and understanding what local fat activisms look like around the world.

During our conversation I made the naïve assumption that a developing international discourse around fat activism was the result of the powerful movements of fat feminist discourse. Well, isn't that a fanciful idea! The reality is more depressing. More people are getting into fat activism because it is a necessary survival tactic in the face of global obesity epidemicTM rhetoric established in 2000 by the World Health Organization.

As well as massively exacerbating pre-existing fatphobia, the WHO's take on obesity has been a Western diet industry sponsored project of market expansion and colonisation of places where fat was not regarded as much of a problem until the turn of the millennium. There is evidence aplenty to show that, alt…

Understanding and Dealing with Online Harassment

“Fatties Gonna Fat.”That’s the first message I ever received from an internet troll. I had two immediate thoughts: What does this even mean, and who has enough free time to send this kind of nonsense to strangers?Now, over six years later, I’ve become an expert in online harassment the hard way. There are forums devoted specifically to hating me, and the largest has over 4,000 members. Websites exist with the sole purpose of ruining my reputation, and there are coordinated efforts to convince people to cancel bookings and abandon partnerships with me. Map routes from my home to the places I work out have been published online, along with my home address and telephone number. Trolls have shown up at events I attend, including at speaking engagements and triathlons. They’ve taken pictures and videos and harassed me, the event organizers, and other participants. Once they even tripped the fire alarm during a speaking gig.It’s one thing to have to deal with the trolls who inevitably show …

Roxane Gay, Midwest Writer’s Workshop, and Breaking the Silence of Fatphobia

Roxane Gay recently outed the Midwest Writer’s Workshop board for committing blatant fatphobia against Sarah Hollowell:Image shows a series of tweets from Roxane Gay, @rgay, text as follows:I am going to call out the Midwest Writers workshop for fatphobia.Sarah Hollowell, who I met through MWW has worked with them for five years. She was voted to be on the organizational committee.But then someone said “do we really want someone like her representing us?” That person elaborated “someone so fat. It’s disgusting.” Only two people in that room spoke up for SarahThey committee decided to NOT bring Sarah on board. Because of her body. But because she is “so talented” they are willing to hire her for less public things.This is unacceptable. And cruel. And cowardly, Midwest Writers Workshop. And you thought you could get away with it. You very nearly did.I guess I too am too fat and disgusting for your workshop. Which is fine. But Sarah was a tireless worker on your behalf. She is intelligen…

Fatphobia At The Spa

A number of blog readers let me know about an incident at a nail salon where they hung a sign saying “Sorry, but if you are overweight, pedicures will be $45 due to service fees for pedicurists. Thank you!”I’m not sure if I’m more insulted about “Sorry” (are you, really?) or “Thank you!” (Um, you’re welcome? You sizeist ass). I blogged about this specific incident here, but it’s part of a much larger issue of fatphobia that affects fat people’s every day lives. A “fat tax” is an additional fee that is charged to fat patrons by services like pedicurists, spas, even massage therapists. Sometimes it even goes beyond a tax to complete exclusion. I asked some fat folks to share their stories.One of the most common forms of exclusion is to simply create an environment that doesn’t accommodate fat people.MH faced this as a massage therapist: “When I was a new massage therapist, I worked at a spa that did not have tables large enough to accommodate people of all sizes. It was really frustrati…

Famous Fat Celebrities -- Sharon Jones: "Too Fat, Too Black"

I just came across the biographic details of an amazing entertainer with whom I was unfamiliar. Her name was Sharon Jones. She was a soul and funk singer so full of energy and fierceness on stage that she was sometimes called "the female James Brown."

She led a fascinating and inspiring life, full of hardships overcome through sheer guts and hard work. Against all odds, she achieved fame and renown in middle age. And when she was handed a difficult diagnosis of terminal cancer at far too young an age, she persevered with her life's work and continued breaking barriers for women and people of color for as long as she could. She died a peaceful death, full of music and grace, surrounded by her family and her band. Hers was a life well-lived.


Sharon Lafaye Jones was born May 4, 1956 in Augusta Georgia. She was born to Ella Mae Price Jones and Charlie Jones. She was the youngest of six children. After Ella Mae's sister died, she raised her sister's four childr…